falling

sometimes things are just falling.
because of gravity. exhaustion. weakness. eccentricity. the misstreatment of people. ignorance. the feeling of irresponsibility. or cold hearts.

like in the song of florence and the machine. she found so beautiful and also excentric examples for falling..

i've fallen out of favor and i've fallen from grace

fallen out of trees and i've fallen on my face
fallen out of taxis, out of windows too
fell in your opinion when i fell in love with you

last week my skirt fell. i just got off the metro and felt my skirt is falling. The zip opened by itself and then it slid down on my legs. fortunately i am the girl with the short skirt and the long jacket. so no one could see the falling skirt.

the next day my friend miki told me that also from her was falling something. she ate a snickers and then there was a really big nut in it. but then she realized it was a tooth. disgusting imagination to find someones tooth in your chocolate. then she thought oh my, how many teeth did i eat already with all the snickers. but then a friend told her that it was her own. sure.

that same night i wore that same falling skirt and i went out to control and danced and had a lot of fun and lost control a bit and then, of course, i lost control over my skirt again. it fell. but that time i had no jacket over it to hide. i guess it was fun for some persons. so far about falling skirts in control!

so why do things keep on falling from us? what does it mean? and why is it happening again and again and again?

that control night my friend gave me a needle to provide my skirt from falling again. and with it was a button. and i lost it. it fell. of course.

it’s good to have someone by your side that provides you from falling. like peter doherty sings: lady don’t you fall backwards, please fall into my arms. then falling is a great thing.

sometimes i wish for falling, wish for the release
wish for falling through the air to give me some relief
because falling's not the problem, when i'm falling i'm at peace
it's only when i hit the ground it causes all the grief

i love to fall into somebodys arms. to surrender control to somebody else's hands. just for you know there is somebody taking care of you. not for long, never forever, just for that instant. that's so great! thanks dear friends to keep on catching me in all these moments!

i dance with myself, i drunk myself down
found people to love, left people to drown
i'm not scared to jump, i'm not scared to fall
if there was nowhere to land i wouldn't be scared at all

fall

again and again and again and again...

sometimes i wish for falling, wish for the release
wish for falling through the air to give me some relief
because falling's not the problem, when i'm falling i'm at peace
it's only when i hit the ground it causes all the grief

ps: yesterday i experimented with falling again. i let me fall down backwards in the insane hope for somebody catching me up and hit the groud. lost control in control but noone wanted to surrender..

"tenderly, tastefully..."

...

quotes.

the most ridiculous and dense sex quotes ever

1. can i use your computer? i need to watch some porn to get done.

2. oh if you’re not ready yet… i have several male flat mates.

3. i don’t want to support the condom industry. plus i don’t believe in aids!

4. if you’re afraid of sex accidents then we should stop having sex.

[tbc.]

"crtl+home"

i already know that by now. a thing i will miss so much when i have to leave bucharest: it’s control. it became already a part of me. i love it. we love it. we love the music. the bar. our chairs. the plenty of tuborgs we had there. the concerts there. the always broken bathroom [buda]. wishing for songs. dancing in the crowd. dancing at the bar. the people. we even know the people. all. we recognize persons who don’t belong to the inner circle of “controllers”. really. we can see it in their faces.

i’m so glad i came here. somehow my bucharest life began with control. i made so lovely friends here. and still do. and when i’m back in germany i brood backwards and think: she’s lost control. my friends at work often make fun of me. for them it seems that i only and too often hang out in that club. and nowhere else. well that’s true. tuesday in a computer radio program i had to type in the combination of tabs “control+home”. yes! it’s my second home.


miki and i considered to take our beds with us to control for then we won’t have such a long way to walk every day. one week we went there: tuesday, thursday, friday AND saturday AND sunday. we even take our food to control to eat it there. we should stay there one day for breakfast.


so… meeting in control: whot did’u do today? pretty much of nothing. and in the evening? wasting time and money. but all that with the finest indie music in our ears. that’s the point. sometimes there were chairs standing in the way of control. i wished i'd be allowed to be the djane there only for one night. doesn’t matter if it's monday. just for fun. i got to know such much new old music from control. really lovely music. i need a t-shirt for beeing back in germany. written on it:

she’s lost control...

sometimes...

sometimes
life isjust asuccessionof

teethbrushing.

robber & coward

you robbed my heart. overwhelmed me in a moment when i did not pay attention. took it for no reason. just because. cruelly you ripped my chest and teared my bleeding beating heart out. you took it with your dirty hands and ran away with it. coward. ran and ran and ran away and then suddenly out of nothing dropped it. my weak bleeding heart. someplace. somewhere. anywhere. for no reason. just because. but remember there is still blood on your hands. maybe you left it at the sideways of a road to somewhere else. but nobody would bring it there or back into my chest. I have to go and find it. have to get it back. cause now i have a hole in my chest. but i like that thought. cause so are you.